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    An Affair Of The Heart

    By Jeri Maier & Peter Wehr

    QUESTION I bought a nice earring jewelry for my wife for her birthday. I thought that she would be happy with it but she was not too excited about it. She thank me graciously for it but I know that it was not what she expected. What should I do next time?
    ANSWER Next time, if you do not have the intention of buying her a one carate diamond earring, go out and buy her some flowers. Then surprise her with a reservation for dinner for two at a place that she loves or a place where she alwasys wanted to go. Some woman loves to shop for jewelry for herself and if you buy her something that does not suit her taste then you are just wasting your time and money. Sorry to be so direct but that is the truth. QUESTION how do you know if someone really loves you? anonymous
    HIS ANSWER In a relationship, it's commitment. That's the only true test. Staying with someone through thick and thin. Overlooking the other's many inconsistencies, promises not kept, and failures . . . as a person, a partner, or parent. We are all very fallable creatures. Time tells all though. But if you are looking for immediate gratification, don't look for it in true love for that takes a lifetime together to build. Love, Pete W. HER ANSWER When the person tells you that he or she loves you. If he or she doesn't tell you - then perhaps it is the lack of opportunity. I can tell when someone loves me also by his deeds - NOT only BY his words. Does he treat me with respect and honor? Does he show his/her respect in public and in private? Does he care about my feeling? Is he totally being honest with me? If I love him and after he shows me all of the above, I will hold his hands, draw him closer and hug him. I will look into those loving eyes and tell him that I LOVE him. Peace, Love and Light, Jeri
    QUESTION every body wants to know if love on line is true.HOW? WHEN? Is it possible to love without knowing every thing about your lover?. anonymous
    HER ANSWER It is more than possible. It happens all the time. You think that you are in love with the person even when you do not have a real 'physical contact' or even his or her 'real' name or 'real' person right infront of you. It happens especially when each of you are communicating and exchanging the 'synergies' that are full of feelings of 'bonding', 'vibrant', 'exhilarating', 'excitment', 'coherent' and ' compatibility'. Love online can happen when one see someone's picture. This can be a real emotional feeling that play havoc in one's vunerlable moment or time of his or her life. It can trigger the imagination and strong feeling toward the object (photograph, picture etc). Sometimes one is more receptive than other. Sometimes one is stronger and process the ability to control feeling or subdue it better than other. At time, there will be a rejection from one of the partners in a relationship and a big disappointment and a feeling of rejection. Whenever you are in love, either it is online just as well as it is happening offline. How many times do you know someone offline and not really know the truth about the person? Many times, a couple can experience 'union of spirits and souls'!!!!! Love online can turn out to be a real life bliss if and when the couple meet and discover that they are just as compatible off-line as well as on-line. Only you will be the one to tell How and When you are going to fall in love with someone online (or offline). WHEN you experience it you will know the HOW and WHY. You can resist all you want but in the end, it is a path in your Destiny. It may last forever or it may not.... Just enjoy the journey while it lasts. Peace, Love and Light -Jeri Best wishes in your love.. Peace, Love and Light, -Jeri
    HIS ANSWER Love on Line. Well love is always on the line, but seriously I believe that the question is referring to love through internet connection. Actually, my response to Question above has some to do with my response here as well. But first, let me address the more immediate part of the question. Can one find love on the internet. Yes, anything is possible where matters of the heart is concerned. Can it be a lasting relationship? Yes, it can. Can it be fulfilling? Again, yes. But it a much more difficult relation. Think about it. A relationship where two people are living together, facing daily challenges, have a diffucult enough time as it is. Why do people marry anyway? To be together! To share in the hardships of life . . . and there are many, and to find comfort and completion in each other. While some of the normal rituals of dating are missing initially, they are eventually found when the two finally come together. Is it harder to find a lasting relationship on the internet? Yes it is, and for too many reasons to count, just to name a few, too many unknowns, too many variables, certain validations are missing, those nonverbal messages that cannot be seen or acknowledged, and what about the verbal communication aspect of it. Are you sure what I said is actually the intended message that you heard, or what you wanted to hear? We want to be loved, and to give love in return. We want tenderness, and for some strange reason, it's easier to give and receive that emotion with a perfect stranger over the computer. We can be in a room full of people that we love and who love us, and still be lonely, and find fulfillment over the computer with someone that is truly listening . . . but the person sitting right next to you hasn't heard a word you've said. Unfortunately there are more broken hearts over the internet than lasting relationships and happiness. But it is possible!
    QUESTION Is it possible to love without knowing every thing about your lover? HIS ANSWER Yes, of course. You can love and even marry a person without knowing everything about them. It's done all the time. How often have you hear it said, you never get to know the real person you married until after the honeymoon. But truly, some marriages have lasted a very long time and still partners may never know everything there is to know about his or her significant other. We hear stories about that every day. And how many become disallusioned after the honeymoon, and say to themselves, I really screwed up. He or she is not anything like I thought. But what's worse, they hide their shame to keep from hurting friends and loved one, or to keep their marriage for other reasons unknown, and live with the disappointment. Always living with that disappointment in the back of their minds, living a defeated life, depriving themselves of happiness, and denying themselves and their significant others of the best of what life has to offer. In other words, just existing. Love combined with youth is a deadly weapon! Hormones are pinging and out of control. Goodness knows, it's a hard enough for grown-ups to make the right decisions, much less for the inexperienced HER ANSWER I believe that it is very possible. You can love someone wholeheartedly before you know him or her. The question is do you still love him or her after you got to know your loved one?

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